“Adventure didn’t see us coming!”

Inspiring words from my eight year old daughter, whose sense of adventure and curiosity brings a consistent smile to my heart.  She encourages me to be brave and reminds of the importance to explore the unknown, ‘because that’s what it’s for’.  No truer has this approach to life been than the other day, while venturing out to earn our Disney Dollars*, we found ourselves on a particular excursion that brought with it a flood of warm memories and discussions that, until I was in it, didn’t realize just how much I appreciated having them to draw from.  As we sat in a moment and reflected on the life of our since-passed dog, Zina, we talked through some topics I wasn’t sure how I’d handle as a parent…until I did…and it was lovely.

*Disney Dollar –

noun. a token representing a savings contribution, earned by achieving personal, physical and mental goals that push a boundary of difficulty and which can be used toward a family-collective goal of additional activities while at Disney World.

example –

1. The Beandricks family worked hard all year to save their Disney Dollars so that they could partake in the Princess Character Breakfast.
2. Father could not believe how much the Princess Character Breakfast was going to cost, and wishes he could use his fake Disney Dollar tokens instead of real money.

When Alison and I moved into our first house in Guelph, the thing I looked forward to most (besides cohabitating with the one I love, of course) was that our world opened up to the possibility of getting a dog.   The story of how Zina came into our life was somewhat serendipitous and unplanned (I swear, Alison, I didn’t stage the events 😉 ),  she was a rescue dog from Greece and we fell in love with her quickly.  She came to us, as any dog would, with some quirks that quickly changed what our expectations of being a dog owner would mean.  The companion we anticipated as being a running partner, much preferred to take life at her own pace and nap in the middle of the sidewalk instead of running through a forested path.  Our attempts to ‘play’ fetch were met less with puppy-level excitement and more-so with looks of ‘you idiot, you just threw a ball into a freezing cold river,  You go get it.’   She ate her food lying down, had no time for toys, cared little for treats, and could have cared less if you took her for a walk or not.  Her personality, we assume, was formed by the fact that her days in Greece were apparently spent being catered to by the owners of the olympic stadium swimming pool.  If I had grown up basking in the sun, relaxing by a pool, and had my dietary needs tended to daily, then the idea of walking along an Ontario sidewalk in January would sound pretty unappealing, so in a sense: I get how she must have felt.  That’s at least how I like to picture her life in the Mediterranean…the reality is that very likely was not the case, and she would have lived a life of abuse and trauma, hence the need to be rescued.  Whatever her story before us may have been, she was quirky, but she was no less full of love and she felt that love in return.

Fast forward a bit to 5-years after she joined Team Beandricks, when we moved to Elora and began exploring new ground;  forests, trails, and parks unknown for her (and us) to become familiar with in time.  One of the first and lasting places we discovered brought us to a trail near the house, along a narrow and steep path through the gorge, and down to the river where a nearby waterfall and the walls of the canyon sheltered away the noise of everything else.  And while she didn’t take advantage of the serene watering hole that quickly became almost a daily venture for us, she did seem to enjoy spending time by the shores of the grand watching the world go by undisturbed.  Eventually our little troupe grew a little larger when Nora was born, and again shortly after with Audrey.  Though the kids would be too young to remember vividly, I certainly cherish the times we made that trek as a family and just sat in a moment in time together.  Then the condo construction began.

I won’t officially weigh in here on how I feel about the condo construction, but I will state facts; one of which being that breaking ground on the construction of a new condo meant that the path through the forest that led to our little swimming hole was no longer- torn down, ripped up and shuttered.  Where there once was a quiet trail through the woods there now stands a tower of concrete and glass.  Suffice to say – our regular excursions drew to an end.  It was disappointing, to say the least.

Fast forward another 5 years, and in the time that passed we had to sadly put our wonderful Zina to sleep for a variety of illness related reasons.  The girls talk about her once in a while and seem to have latched on to memories of them cuddling with her, climbing all over her, and express how much they miss having her around.   They’ve been bringing her up more and more these days, perhaps their way of planting the seed for mom and dad to bring home a puppy one day (kids are clever…never underestimate their ability to manipulate).  So, the other day when Nora and I were on a Disney Dollar walk and she pointed to a hole a fence next to a No Trespassing sign that happened to lead to a trail that connected to a path down to our old watering hole, I was quick to suggest that we “go on an adventure.”

Let me be clear here: I would never put my children in danger, and I would never suggest that they break a rule that could hurt them or anyone else.  I will, however, encourage them to use their brain and question if some rules are okay to bend a little.  And with that in mind, we tucked back the veil of the chain link and crawled through the hole to the other side.  I think Nora was equal parts nervous and energized by the action of breaking the rules, and perhaps one day I’m going to feel the results of that conflict in ways I can’t predict, but for the moments that followed on that particular day, I feel good about the decision we made to venture down to a place I hadn’t been in years to relive some memories with my kiddo that I don’t know how otherwise would have come up.

We chatted through the joy that Zina brought our family, as well as answering some questions around death, the process, the decision and the aftermath of what that decision meant.  I believe in honesty, especially when my children are brave and curious enough to ask the question.  I do not want to traumatize them, obviously, but I do believe, or at least I am learning, that there is a delicate way to be honest about certain subjects that I feel earns more respect than dancing around the issue or skirting it altogether.  We talk and are open about some heavy subjects and, while they may be sad, they also got us talking again about our puppy, the joy, and the laughter she brought into our home for so many years.  For that I have no regrets and I’ll trespass again if I have to.

We don’t sit in our sadness but we do let it in, just as we do with all emotions, recognizing the importance they each can bring.  We then watched Inside Out.  We cuddled on the couch.  We laughed.  I cried.  We reflected on our day.  It was a good day.

….damn it.  Are we about to get a dog?
#inception. #kidsaresmart